Lost,hurt,tired and lonely...

I have one of these days were I wish I was never born.
I guess Dan is right..
I tend to get depressed when the pain is to much and
Sander is not around..
but I don't know.
Lately it has been almost to much for me ...
I feel so tired of life itselves.
I just want to hide and sleep...
but then I can't because of the damned pain..

Ok so I do complain a lot...but right now I feel entitled too do so.
There are so many things missing from life ...
So many places I should have been.
So many .....I almost said dreams...
but that is not true...I don't dream anymore...
and I don't plan ahead.
I just exist...

And with Sander gone and me trapped here...
the fourth wall in my room is missing.

I am just lost, hurt, tired and lonely..
and I doubth something beautiful will ever come my way...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C1oOaKpOrPs&feature=related