No God.

Reading and crying
Reliving our past.

It is like hearing his voice
dark, warm and sweet..
wispering in my ear
It hurts so bad
No attack can make me hurt
half as bad as this

And still
I can't stop
I crave him

It makes him so alive
Like he would be here
anytime
home

together.


Another time
another life

How can I ever live again..
Do I want to?

I am so lonely
so painstalkingly alone
and this big scary world
so empty
he is not in it anymore..

Is he
in me...
Somehow?

I want him to be
I want a sign

I want to belive
that he is waiting

But where?
I have no God to pray to
No one to trust

His God
is not mine
never was
if he is with him now

we will never be together
apart
for all
eternity

I am mostly
in bed
the pain
wont let me sit

I am waiting
for it
to
end it
all

I
want
out.

Oblivion.

S.